Feb 7, 2013

Lessons in Patience

For over two years now I have known that I had a hernia.  I went to the doctor when I first discovered the problem, but against his counsel, I elected to postpone doing anything about it.  Several months ago it started to hurt off and on, but I still waited.  Finally, with some serious persuasion from my daughter, I decided it was time to do something about it.  So last Tuesday I had outpatient surgery to fix the problem.  First can I just say that I do not like anesthesia!  Hate, loathe, despise and abominate the disconnected weird sensation when you come out of it that persists for hours after.  Day of surgery was pretty uneventful, I slept, ate a little and slept some more-pain pills cause serious drowsiness for me.  Next day the pain had arrived, but not nearly as intense as I expected.  As long as I avoided moving I was good.  By the third day I stopped taking those vile pain pills and moved to ibuprofen.  So really the pain has been manageable, except for when I have tried to do more than I should.  So why has this been a lesson in patience?  Because I have realized that I don't have any patience while my body tries to heal.

I had plans to do a lot of reading last week, couldn't stay awake long enough to do more than read my scriptures each day.  I was trying to read Les Mis, and fell asleep twice in less than two pages.  I finally ended up watching several episodes of a show I have heard a lot about because it didn't matter if I drifted in and out of that.  You know those days when you would give anything to just go get in your bed and take a long nap, or even a short one, but there just isn't time.  Or when resting with your feet up is a treasure, well forced resting is for the birds!  And unfortunately resting in my bed is the only place where I am pain free, even sitting for extended periods is uncomfortable.  Today I decided to try to go to the store to get some Valentine's candy. Simple, quick and I have permission from the doctor to do more this week as long as my body can handle it and doesn't involve lifting.  When I got back home I was ready for a nap.  It is frustrating to be unable to just set a schedule and assume that your body will cooperate.

So enough whining, it is frustrating, but really it is pretty cool that these amazing bodies of ours know how to heal themselves.  I am so grateful that the pain was not nearly as bad as the doctor made it sound.  I am grateful for my general good health, I know there are many who deal with pain and other issues everyday.  Sometimes we need a little time to be forced to rest to remember the blessings that we have, and to have more compassion for the suffering that others experience.  I am grateful for so many kind people who have picked up the slack for me, brought us dinner, and called to check if I was ok.  My family have been troopers as well.  Tony was a great nurse, and all the kids have been pitching in to take care of things.  I am not going to lie, I will be grateful to be back to normal (if that is even a possibility for me), but I am thankful to have had some time to ponder and to be still.

1 comment:

  1. Glad you are feeling better. It does take awhile. I hate anesthesia too! Terry has had hernia surgery twice. He thought his second doctor was much better than the first, because he didn't have as much pain. I think he learned the patience thing between the first and second surgeries. He just took it easy and mostly laid around for a week and he did quite well. The first time he with dr. permission tried to train a new route man a week after his surgery and it took him a month to really feel very good. Rest is the best.

    ReplyDelete