Lessons in Patience

For over two years now I have known that I had a hernia.  I went to the doctor when I first discovered the problem, but against his counsel, I elected to postpone doing anything about it.  Several months ago it started to hurt off and on, but I still waited.  Finally, with some serious persuasion from my daughter, I decided it was time to do something about it.  So last Tuesday I had outpatient surgery to fix the problem.  First can I just say that I do not like anesthesia!  Hate, loathe, despise and abominate the disconnected weird sensation when you come out of it that persists for hours after.  Day of surgery was pretty uneventful, I slept, ate a little and slept some more-pain pills cause serious drowsiness for me.  Next day the pain had arrived, but not nearly as intense as I expected.  As long as I avoided moving I was good.  By the third day I stopped taking those vile pain pills and moved to ibuprofen.  So really the pain has been manageable, except for when I have tried to do more than I should.  So why has this been a lesson in patience?  Because I have realized that I don't have any patience while my body tries to heal.

I had plans to do a lot of reading last week, couldn't stay awake long enough to do more than read my scriptures each day.  I was trying to read Les Mis, and fell asleep twice in less than two pages.  I finally ended up watching several episodes of a show I have heard a lot about because it didn't matter if I drifted in and out of that.  You know those days when you would give anything to just go get in your bed and take a long nap, or even a short one, but there just isn't time.  Or when resting with your feet up is a treasure, well forced resting is for the birds!  And unfortunately resting in my bed is the only place where I am pain free, even sitting for extended periods is uncomfortable.  Today I decided to try to go to the store to get some Valentine's candy. Simple, quick and I have permission from the doctor to do more this week as long as my body can handle it and doesn't involve lifting.  When I got back home I was ready for a nap.  It is frustrating to be unable to just set a schedule and assume that your body will cooperate.

So enough whining, it is frustrating, but really it is pretty cool that these amazing bodies of ours know how to heal themselves.  I am so grateful that the pain was not nearly as bad as the doctor made it sound.  I am grateful for my general good health, I know there are many who deal with pain and other issues everyday.  Sometimes we need a little time to be forced to rest to remember the blessings that we have, and to have more compassion for the suffering that others experience.  I am grateful for so many kind people who have picked up the slack for me, brought us dinner, and called to check if I was ok.  My family have been troopers as well.  Tony was a great nurse, and all the kids have been pitching in to take care of things.  I am not going to lie, I will be grateful to be back to normal (if that is even a possibility for me), but I am thankful to have had some time to ponder and to be still.

Drivers Beware?

So my son turned 16 in January, and on Thursday, his father pulled him out of school to go get his driver's license since he has play practice until after the place closes. Then of course the very next day he wanted to drive himself to the school for practice.  Now in every day life I am not a worrier.  I don't stress about my kids and what they are doing constantly.  But letting them drive is a totally different ball game for me, and the funny thing is I love that they can drive themselves and relieve me of some of my taxi duties.  Alexis was telling Jared that for the first little while he would have to text me to let me know that he had arrived at his desired destination safely.  Jared was thinking that since he was the third to get his license that I would be more laid back about it now.  So they came upstairs to talk to me as I was kind of confined to my room for most of last week (another story for another day maybe).  Jared wanted to drive to the school, first solo driving experience, and was asking permission to do so.  I consulted with Tony for his opinion, which was that our son was the most cautious teenage boy driver that he had ever seen, and that he was fine with him driving our good car to the school. (Old falling apart teenage driving car was still in Logan with Ashley)  So I relented, and let him drive to the school, making him promise to text me as soon as he got there.  Lexie laughed and said, I told you Jared.  (Just in case you were wondering he arrived without incident).

I have been reflecting on why the solo driving makes me nervous when most things don't.  At first I was thinking it was because of all the other crazy drivers on the roads, and worrying about the large weapon everyone is moving around in, but I think it is more than that.  It feels almost like a rite of passage, or that they are moving to a stage of life where I am no longer so essential to them.  Yes I am concerned about their safety, but perhaps somewhere deep down it is a fear of letting them go.  It's all a part of life I guess and after another week or so, I probably won't require Jared to text me any more, but for now it helps me through this process.

Jared truly is a great young man.  I love that he likes to talk to me, and even though I often am sleep deprived because of it, I am so grateful that he feels comfortable confiding in me.  He went on his first date three days after he turned 16.  As I quizzed him about appropriate behavior on a date, and how he should treat a girl, he wasn't rolling his eyes.  He said keep asking me questions, I don't want to do something stupid.  I will just continue to hope and pray that his desire to not do something stupid continues to be his goal when he gets behind the wheel of a car.

What You Can Learn on a Sunday

That magnets stick to braces, a fact we learned during Sacrament Meeting.

That the first flat tire on your 4WD would happen when you need it to drive to Bountiful in a blizzard. Luckily it was in the garage so we didn't have to fix it in said blizzard.

Our non-4WD small car can make it to Bountiful even in a blizzard, but may require alternate routes that have less steep hills.


My son thinks I am a walking fossil.  This same son has strange black curly hairs growing out of his mostly blonde head.

Both of my sons like to wear their sister's turquoise shoes.  Somewhat disturbing.

My son and my husband are both fine to fight over the last two pieces of cake that they were both trying to eat out of the pan at the same time.

It will probably take 45 minutes to have family prayer because no one will stop talking.

Is Winter Over?

This picture was taken on January 12th, pretty much the last time we saw the sun and clear blue sky.

 This has been a brutal January as far as weather goes. First we get the biggest snowstorm we have had since we moved here in 1998, and the first snow day my kids have ever had.  This whole month we have been experiencing the third coldest January on record, with the average daily temperature being well below freezing.  I have even resorted to wearing a coat, and that is saying something.  We have had icicles all over our house and on our front porch that we have repeatedly knocked down-wouldn't want anyone to be impaled by the killer icicle.  And because of said icicles on our front porch that drip during the day, we have created Home Alone stairs up to our door.  We finally bought our first container of Ice Melt ever.  We have never really had an issue with ice because our house faces southwest, and the sun has always done the trick before.  Then we have also had day after day of this wonderful thing they call an inversion.  I think that is way too nice of a name for it.  The air smells like exhaust, you can't see the mountains, it makes you cough and feel like you can't get a deep breath.  It blocks the sun from ever really shining and is just basically miserable, but I'm not complaining.  Then if all this wasn't enough, on Thursday morning we woke up to freezing rain.  Want to know how often we have freezing rain around here, almost never.  Last time was basically 30 years ago.  Solid sheet of ice everywhere.  It took my daughter just a little over an hour to get to school on the bus, and the school is ten minutes away.  My daughter got home from school saying she had fallen three times just getting home.  My youngest thought it was the coolest thing ever, skating everywhere without ice skates.  The icy roads caused school to start two hours late on Friday (Friday was nothing compared to Thursday though, should have started school late on Thursday instead.  Oh well can't expect people who never have seen freezing rain except for in Nebraska to know what to do with it.) The worst part of  the ice though was that my Dad fell while getting his garbage cans.  Now if it would have been me, I would have just left the garbage cans (I didn't even get the mail, I made Grant get it when he got home from school) but my Dad never leaves a job undone.  It's an amazing quality that he has.  If there is something to do, then you just do it.  He has always been that way.  I mention my peach tree needs pruning and the next day he shows up and prunes it, it's just the way he is.  But, I digress.  He went out to put his garbage cans away and slipped and fell on the ice.  Gratefully a nice man saw him and helped him get up and back into the house, but my Mom knew he was in bad shape because he was so pale.  Of course being the tough guy that my Dad is, he said he didn't need to go to the doctor, and refused to go the emergency room. (Understand that one, I go to great lengths to avoid doctors).  Tony took him and my Mom to the doctor Friday morning though where he learned that he had broken his collar bone and the upper part of his arm right by his shoulder. Gratefully no surgery is needed and it was his left arm, but he will be in a sling for a minimum of 6 weeks, probably 8. The other good news is that we are supposed to get a storm that will clear the inversion by Monday and in the forecast we have multiple days above 30! Woohoo!

Goals for 2013

Lexie and I at the Draper Temple last Friday

I read the other day that New Year's Resolutions are usually abandoned by the 17th of January.  How do  you make it past that date?  You don't set your goals until after the 17th.  I have been struggling deciding what I want to accomplish this year.  Goals should stretch you, but not kill you.  So I have been thinking this through when I contemplate a goal-is this something I can realistically accomplish? So, here is what I am thinking...

Will Do:

• Read the Book of Mormon twice in 2013.  For the first time I am going to read it in 60 days.  Lexie is reading it all the way through one more time before her mission, so I thought I would join her.  
• Attend the temple 4 times a month. (let's try it again)
• Read the Doctrine and Covenants all the way through and do the reading each week for Gospel Doctrine. (I put these together because much of the reading for this year is the D&C)
• Read Les Miserables.  Always wanted to read it, but almost 1500 pages has always held me back.  I am already on page 500 now though.  I will do it this time!!
• Finish 2012 scrapbook.
• Do Arches scrapbook. (Yeah that trip was 6 years ago, so many pictures so little time)
• Do a family history project that is still in the planning stage. Finish planning and see if it is doable.
• Fill up holes and touch up paint in the basement.

Would Like to Do:

• Read two more classics after Les Mis.
• Read last two volumes of the Mortal Messiah.
• Read The Continuous Atonement
• Do 2009 Scrapbook and finish Ashley's scrapbooks.
• Paint the deck
• Paint Jared's room

So there you go.  We'll see how it goes.  

 

 

Report on last years goals

We are now 17 days into January, and I am still working out what goals I want to set.  You see once I commit them to paper then they become binding...well at least I have to try to do it.  I always use to view goals as deeply discouraging because it seemed I never fully accomplished them.  I see goals differently now.  For example let's say your goal was to read the scriptures every day for the year.  Instead of reading 365 days, you read 280.  You failed right?  NO!! You read 280 days.  I believe discouragement is one of Satan's biggest tools for so many of us.  If he can just get us focusing on all of our shortcomings, instead of focusing on the improvement we have made we could easily give up.  Just recently two people I care about have expressed discouragement over this very sort of thing.  If only they could see the massive amount of good they do and have accomplished. I think it is good to be a little dissatisfied with ourselves because we always want to be striving to be better, but caution is needed.  I have often been one to be too hard on myself, I am learning though.  I love this quote that I found last year on pinterest.  I am putting it here again, because I for one need reminding.

 So with that thought in mind, I set some goals for myself last year.  Here is my progress report-
 WILL DO:

• Read the Book of Mormon all the way through.  (This one is always on my list, the day is just better when I read from it's pages.)
• Attend the temple 4 times a month 
• Read at least two volumes of the Mortal Messiah
• Finish Personal Progress and receive my second Young Women's medallion
• Scrapbook pictures from 2011

LIKE TO DO:

• Read at least 3 classics this year
• Read Pres. Monson's biography
• Finish Ashley's scrapbooks, Arches scrapbook, and another year of printed pictures
• Paint Jared's room
• Paint main floor bathroom/laundry room
• Paint the deck

The ones crossed out I did.  Let me tell you about my goal to attend the temple 4 times a month.  I didn't make it 4 times.  I only averaged 3 times a month.  Did I fail?  I don't think so.  I went to the temple more times in 2012, than I ever have before in a single year.  That is an accomplishment.  Did I learn some things about myself? Yes.  I see where I can improve.

I think life is always a strugglefest, but the trick is to keep fighting that natural man.  Most important though is to remember what it says in Phillipians 4:13, "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." I think of when my kids were little and my days were spent chasing them.  My goals had to be simple.  Like-keep the kids from hurting each other, mostly.  Keep the kids from burning down or destroying the house, mostly. Shower every day.  My personal goals were pretty limited as my personal time was limited. I tried to always make time for scripture reading and prayer, FHE and the like, but it was always short and simple.  I promised myself that when the kids were older I would use more of my time for study and learning.  Now my kids are older.  No time like the present to keep those promises! So as I set my goals for this year, my desire is to continue to fulfill that promise I made to myself. (And to finish up those stupid painting projects, because by next year I am sure there will be something else that needs to be painted!)

What snow is good for...

So after all the snowing was done, at least for now, we had about 30 inches of snow.  That is a lot of snow for us here in this part of Farmington.  There are definitely some negatives to snow-like slick roads, icy parking lots where you almost fall multiple times, wet and dirty shoes coming in and out of your house all day, and snow clothes hanging everywhere.  But instead of dwelling on the possible negatives, let me share some positives that I saw.

• Families out shoveling snow, it was not a one person job.  Neighbors helping other neighbors shovel.
• Meetings and school cancelled allowing us to have a little extra, and sometimes unusual family time.
• Snow covered roads that were plowed slower than normal around here, allowed for a lot of children to be pulled in sleds and on skis around the neighborhood.  Jared was almost surprised when Tony sad he would pull him around behind the car.  (Yes it was probably dangerous, and it might have made me a bit nervous, but it's a memory he likely won't forget.)
• Sledding in the snow.  What fun to speed down a snow covered hill.  All three of my youngest enjoyed that yesterday.
• Must mention the importance for snow in Utah, to give this mostly desert state water for the summer.  Last winter was awful, so it was crucial for this winter to be a good one.  So far so good.
• The beauty of the snow.  I love it when the sun comes out and it looks like there are little diamonds sparkling everywhere.  It hurts your eyes, but you can't look away because the beauty is awe-inspiring. 

 

• A new positive we learned last night was that big snow banks give you a good place to hide.  Jared will be 16 in 10 days!!  Heaven help us!  The Valentine's dance is coming up in February and last night he asked a girl to go with him.  She happened to live on a long straight street with no place to hide after ringing the doorbell.  Then he realized he could lay down on the sidewalk between the snow banks and no one could see him.  Who knew huge snow banks could be so useful.  Lexie and I were laughing watching him lying there on the sidewalk waiting for them to come to the door.  It probably helps to understand the humor knowing that the thermometer in our car was measuring between below 0 temps and ICE.  We were getting ice on the inside of the windows it was so cold.  So there was my son lying on a frozen sidewalk in only a sweatshirt and jeans.  It was great!

 Time has a tendency to remove the bad that happened, so my memories of the past are for the most part very pleasant.  When I look back on the Winter Storm of Jan 2013, I am pretty sure these things are what I will remember.